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In Parshat Bechukotai we encounter the powerful description of the blessings and curses associated with following or violating Hashem’s mitzvot. Seemingly the torah provides a clear choice: follow in Hashem’s way leading to peace, happiness, and salvation or disobey leading to anguish, suffering, and exile. This parsha provides us an opportunity to explore the psychological concept of learned helplessness, which often created a victim mentality, and empower ourselves through choice.
Learned helplessness was a concept first studied collaborating psychologists Martin Seligman and Steven Maier. It illustrates that when individuals face repeated exposure to adversity and uncontrollable events, they become passive and unable to take corrective actions to improve their circumstance. They feel powerless and believe that no effort will change the situation, instituting a state of helplessness. Furthering this concept through the lens of behavior often seen within recent event, learned helplessness that persists can evolve into a victim mentality, where people see themselves as perpetual victims of oppressive circumstance, rather than gaining control over their lives.
In the Parasha, Hashem provides Bnei Yisrael with binary decisions and consequences for their choice. "Im-bechukkotai telechu ve'et-mitzvotai tishmeru va'asitem otam - If you follow My statutes and observe My commandments and perform them" (Leviticus 26:3), you will be blessed with rain in its season, fruitful land, and peace. However, "Ve'im-lo tishme'u li velo ta'asu et kol-hammitzvot ha'elleh - But if you do not obey Me and do not observe all these commandments, (Leviticus 26:14), you will face disease, famine, defeat by enemies, and ultimately exile.
The tochacha, admonition, is a sobering account of punishments and curses may seem overwhelming, potentially fostering a sense of learned helplessness in people. This perception could lead them to adopt a victim mentality, resigning themselves to their fate without attempting to change their behavior or circumstances. However, Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks said, “Never define yourself as a victim. There is always a choice, and by exercising the strength to choose, we can rise above fate.”
However, the Torah provides a crucial lesson against this mindset. Even after listing the severe punishments, Hashem comforts us as only a father would: “But despite all of this…I will not reject them or annual my covenant with them, for I am Hashem their G-d (Leviticus 26:44-45). This passage emphasizes that despite our choice, Hashem continues to stand by us, hoping that next time we choice wiser. It assures us that we are not condemned to a life of helplessness and victimhood and we have the power to change our destiny through our actions and attitudes.
This divine message is crucial in combating learned helplessness and the victim mentality. It teaches that regardless of past mistakes or current hardships, individuals always have the agency to choose a different path. By taking responsibility for their actions and choices, they can break the cycle of suffering and open themselves to divine blessings.
Here are three brief tips to reduce learned helplessness and a victim mentality:
- Challenging negative beliefs: identify thoughts that contribute to feeling helpless ad actively challenge them
- Make small choices: start with small attainable goals to build confidence and regain self control.
- Seek supportive help: surround yourself with positive people who inspire and empower you to grow.
Parshat Bechukotai, offers us profound spiritual and psychological advise - we are not helpless victims to the events of our lives but rather empowered by our ability to choose. It's essential to remember that while we may face difficult and uncontrollable circumstances, our response to these challenges is within our control. By choosing proactive and positive actions, seeking help, and maintaining faith in our ability to effect change, we can avoid the trap of learned helplessness. The Torah encourages us to reject a victim mentality, by choosing choices that will provide us with paths to bring us closer to Hashem and betterment for ourselves.
Elan Javanfard, M.A., L.M.F.T. is a Consulting Psychotherapist focused on behavioral health redesign, a Professor of Psychology at Pepperdine University, & a lecturer related to Mindfulness, Evidence Based Practices, and Suicide Prevention. Elan is the author of Psycho-Spiritual Insights: Exploring Parasha & Psychology, weekly blog. He lives in Los Angeles Pico Robertson community with his wife and three children and can be reached at Elan.Javanfard@gmail.com.