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Our Gemara on amud beis tells us about the contents of the Holy Ark:
“Both the second set of tablets and the broken pieces of the first set of tablets were placed in the Ark.”
Why keep the broken tablets in the Ark? What prominence and lesson do they hold? Tiferes Shlomo (Sha’ar Hatefila) explains, based on a Zohar (III:283a), that the human heart has two chambers. One chamber represents the aspect of expansion and joy in attachment to Hashem and the Torah, as represented by the whole tablets. The second chamber of the heart, is also attached to Hashem and the Torah, but is connected and in touch with the broken parts; the shame of sins committed. This is represented by the broken tablets.
A healthy and whole person is in touch with his or her broken parts. This is part of the paradox of humility, self-esteem and narcissism. According to researchers Bak and Kutnik (“Domains of intellectual humility: Self-esteem and narcissism as independent predictors”, Journal of Personality and Individual Differences, 7/2021), citing the insights of Brummelman, et al. (“Raising Children With High Self-Esteem (But Not Narcissism). Child Dev Perspect, 2020, 14: 83-89”):
Narcissism and self-esteem are conceptually different, though related, phenomena. A key characteristic of narcissism is the belief in being superior, which is nurtured by parents overestimating their child and emphasizing his or her uniqueness. A key characteristic of high self-esteem, in contrast, is the belief that one is worthy, which comes from the parents' affirmed conviction that the child is simply a valuable and important person. Narcissism is associated with the need to dominate and to treat others as instruments to achieve a goal, while high self-esteem is connected with the desire to deepen relationships with others. Narcissism and self-esteem are formed in the same, quite early developmental period, but they grow from different developmental experiences.
Whether a person has self-esteem or is instead, narcissistic will impact on his or her ability to embody Intellectual Humility. Intellectual Humility is defined as Intellectual humility speaks to people’s willingness to reconsider their views, to avoid defensiveness when challenged, and to moderate their own need to appear “right.” It is sensitive to counter-evidence, realistic in outlook, strives for accuracy, shows little concern for self-importance, and is corrective of the natural tendency to strongly prioritize one’s own needs. (https://www.templeton.org/discoveries/intellectual-humility#:~:text=Intellectual%20humility%20speaks%20to%20people's,and%20is%20corrective%20of%20the)
In Bak and Kutnik’s research, they compared the trait of Intellectual Humility and its correlation between narcissism and self-esteem, by using validated questionnaires and scales to measure respondents attitudes toward self and others. (The scales used were: (1) Comprehensive Intellectual Humility Scale and Limitations-Owning Intellectual Humility Scale; (2) Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale; and (3) the Narcissistic Personality Inventory.) They discovered that persons with healthy self-esteem high Intellectual Humility was positively correlated to self-esteem, while low Intellectual Humility was correlated with narcissism.
Thus, we see that a truly confident person can be humble, while the arrogant person’s deep insecurity hampers his ability to see or learn from others.
Translations Courtesy of Sefaria, except when, sometimes, I disagree with the translation
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